Thursday, July 31, 2008 ♥
Everytime when I grow a little more in my thinking, i feel even more insecure of my life. It's like, the world our eyes see become smaller each day.
Remember when you were little/young, you would say, "I wanna be a doctor/lawyer!". But now that we're somewhat grown up, our ambitions become smaller everyday. Last time it could be that big big dream of having a bungalow.. But now, if can manage to live in a 3 room flat already very good le.
Sigh. I find that growing up is a hassle. Why? Cause when we're older, adults (meaning your parents) expect you to be responsible for yourself, and for your actions. And they stop complimenting you.
I've no idea why parents like to compare people. Not that my mother ever did compare much. But when it comes to money matters, boy does she grumble. It's like when I work, i'm expected to give her part of my pay. And for your info, before my work at fairprice, my longer work period was only 5 days. How to give her pay like that?
And also, when you make a small mistake, your parents would blame the older one instead of the younger one. Why? Cause "they are still young". That's what i've heard for more than once. And also, to appear impartial, they will scold the one at fault first, and come another round to scold the elder one. (yes, it's really sad to be an older one)
Well, I don't know. I just feel that as i grow older, i cannot be sure if i'm able to make my life the kind i want. Will i be able to fulfill my dreams, so that my life won't be meaningless? Life is meaningless without a dream you know.
Bah. It's so late already. And i better go to bed. Otherwise this lazy ass me would not be able to make it for DMD. Some more i late for 2 lessons already. :x
GOOD LUCK TO MY FUTURE! :D
From Mabel; with ♥
1:16 AM
